Talking about sex is very important and should be a natural part of the relationship, without being embarrassing. How often do you talk to your partner about sex? Are you perhaps more comfortable having sex with your partner than discussing it? Talking about sex is very important and should be a natural part of the relationship, without being embarrassing.
What does it include?
It is perfectly natural to wonder what it means to talk to the spouse about sex. Is it done before or after you sleep? Do I speak out or do I try to express myself in other ways? Do I compile a list of topics and think of a thunderstorm? This has probably all been done. Talking about sex can take many pictures, ranging from discussing what you feel in bed to a more serious discussion about acceptance and conception.
But talking about sex is embarrassing ...
If you can share your body with others then you should be able to share your mind as well. Sex is usually best when individuals can speak it frankly and openly. Being able to talk openly about sex can prevent your negative experience or that of your spouse.
It is understandable that you feel uncomfortable talking about sex. Opening up to something as personal can be difficult, but the exercise creates the master and it delivers a better experience and strengthens you at the same time.
How do I have the conversation?
How you talk to your partner about sex depends on what your relationship is and what it is you want to discuss. Here are some tips to keep in mind if you’re unsure how to start the conversation:
- Decide in advance what you want to say, it can help to write it down on a piece of paper. Have your own feelings and thoughts before you ask your partner to do so
- Start the conversation based on something else. It could be something you read or saw on TV.
- Keep the conversation light. Talking about sex doesn’t have to be serious, but be careful not to talk unnecessarily and take into account your partner’s feelings. Try to keep the atmosphere relaxed.
- Have the conversation outside the bedroom walls. It can help you not feel vulnerable when discussing sensitive issues.
- Talk about your feelings. Try to say rather how you feel rather than putting all the blame on your spouse. Example: “I just don’t feel good when this happens” rather than “When you do this I feel bad”
If your partner has something to do, listen with respect, your partner might also be insecure about these issues and it takes courage. Your spouse may want to try something that you are not interested in, but allow him to complete and explain your position. Don’t do anything that you don’t want, but it’s good to respect his partner’s feelings too.
How do I express myself without making my spouse feel bad?
Tips are not bad if they are worded correctly and constructively.
- Praise something you like before you criticize something that could go better, then your spouse doesn’t feel like he can’t do anything right.
- Wait until afterward. It does not help anyone to criticize the performance of the middle bran.
- Do not supply the feelings within you and throw it all over to your partner in an instant. The constant conversation is better than one blast.
How do I express myself in the midst of the scrapes without breaking the mood?
Your mid-sexual intercourse should not be limited to dirty talk. You are not only bound by the words, but you can also express what you like and dislike with body language and gestures. You might try to guide the spouse in the right position with the body or indicate it when he is doing something right with a different expression than words.
If you feel better about using the words, you can constructively say that you like something your spouse is doing. There is also nothing to ask for something to be done differently or to ask if the spouse is ready to try something new.
It is also important to take into account the spouse, ask him how he feels and what he likes before trying something new. Your respect between ways makes you feel secure. Safety is a key issue, never leave your safety on the hook because you fear “ruining the mood”.
What should I do if I don't want to have sex with him anymore?
Consent is the most important thing when it comes to sex. Consent must be clear before anything sexual takes place and during it, too. If you have been in a sexual relationship for a long time, it may be difficult to convey that you do not want to have sex with your partner anymore. It does not change that if you feel this way, you must make it clear. Choose a place that makes you feel good and truly tell what lies in your heart. Try not to be unkind to your partner’s feelings. All relationships, romantic, friends and sexual can end. If the person is a fairly healthy person then he will understand it.