Love is a treasure chest of many little things that make us feel good (sometimes even bad), but the package must be taken completely. Sex alone, in the long run, tired and leaves us nothing
A question that we all asked ourselves at least once in our life: how to understand if it is sex or love with him? Since the way of living sex is very different for men and women, it often happens to go in two different directions without realizing it. At the beginning of a relationship, every woman hopes that those moments of crackling intimacy will result in mad eternal love. A man thinks … Who knows what he thinks! But the fact is that, nowadays, it is easy to be treated as lovers even when he is single, free as the wind. Needless to reiterate the concept that men come from Mars and women from Venus, right?
It, therefore, seems appropriate to draw up a small list of signals to understand whether the partner is true love or just sex.
You have nothing to discuss
Hot messages at 3 am and sex texting, phone calls in the middle of the night, fire and flames under the sheets. But then? Once the moment of passion is over, there is embarrassment in speaking of this and that. How is it possible to have an intense sexual connection with someone you might not even have a decent conversation with? As happened to Stassi Reid, author of the website dedicated to Bolde relations, “sex was a fairy tale, but when I finished that I couldn’t wait to leave”.
Check the smartphone continuously during the appointment
Bad, bad sign. If you don’t do anything other than a chat with the new flame and a check on your Instagram account, it means that – out of bed, there is nothing more. Simple, direct, sharp, but true. “And never underestimate this point,” says Reid.
You realize that expectations do not correspond to reality
“I really thought that my relationship was a whirling love story, like the one described in fairy tales. But instead I was living a nightmare, trapped in the image I had made of the relationship but it didn’t correspond to reality at all!”, Writes Reid. Sex, when it’s beautiful and overwhelming, can often overshadow everything else and make us live a dream. From which, however, we wake up.
The report does not progress
Each relationship goes through different phases at its own pace. When you get stuck in one of these phases, the relationship cannot evolve and move on to the next one. If after months and months the couple is still in the “all beautiful, all light, like a honeymoon perennial” situation, be careful, because this means that the relationship has not reached the stage of intimacy and mutual comparison, fundamental moments that define a lasting love – different from a few nights of unbridled sex.
Feel that you are missing something but you don’t know what
The feeling of being in a couple relationship, but feeling empty at the same time is really devastating and never leads to anything good. “When you feel that feeling it is a clear signal that what you have in front of you is just a story of sex and not true love “.
The butterflies in your stomach hurt you
The classic expression to define a falling in love – having butterflies in the stomach – can have a negative conception when that feeling of nervousness never passes.
Sex is fantastic but at some point, it stops being fantastic
When making love is good, the rest becomes blurred, blurred, clouded. Because everything seems perfect when there is a strong sexual understanding. But if this then vanishes, and in your hand, there is no other deep emotion left, that is the moment to face the reality: it is only sex without love.
You feel trapped
“I cared a lot about my ex, but I wanted to see what else was out there. The problem was that his moves in the bedroom kept me trapped. I couldn’t give up those nights of passionate sex, even if out of from the sheets the relationship was empty. I was afraid to leave it because having an understanding and sexual chemistry with someone is difficult, so I thought: what if I couldn’t find a sexual partner like him anymore ? “. When you are at this level, as told by the author of Bolde, you already have the answer.
You ask if something is wrong with you
Those who often experience short relationships, made of sex and little else, find themselves experiencing negative feelings such as lack of self-esteem and emotional insecurity. “Is there something wrong with me? I don’t deserve a legitimate relationship?” When these thoughts start to ride the mind, the time has come to stop and take care of yourself.
The ‘ Love is a deep feeling and ever-changing, never the same and never leaves the same emotions. Love includes passion, intimacy, sexual understanding. Love is a treasure chest of many little things that make us feel good (and yes, sometimes even bad), but the package must be taken completely. Sex alone, in the long run, tired and leaves us nothing to think about.